How to Survive a Long-Distance Relationship

What can couples do to stay close when they are so far away from each other? PC: Huffington Post

Relationships are difficult enough as it is, but moving away from one another may seem like the end of your once-perfect relationship. Now, though, those in long distance relationships should, ideally, be able to thrive. With social media, cell phones, the internet, and above all FaceTime, you no longer require a messenger pigeon, the Pony Express, or a strong smoke signal to hear from your significant other; you just need a somewhat decent internet connection.

Try your best to talk to your partner in your free time, but leave enough space so he/she does not feel obligated to talk to you. Once people feel like they have to do something, they will no longer want to do it. This is important because you do not want superficial love, but real, wholesome, and genuine love. If you have to force it, it becomes more susceptible to break. Being able to get in touch with one another is only one part of making it work.

The other is make the little things count, because those are going to mean the most. Send your better half a little postcard to let it be known that you miss him/her and that you wish he/she were there. Always remember birthdays and special events, and be someone to talk to on the bad days; send something you know will get a laugh.

In the time you can actually, physically see your best friend, take videos and pictures (a lot), as this will remind you both exactly why you are waiting and how much joy and laughter you bring to each other. Be careful, however, not to become too wrapped up in taking a picture of the moment, instead of living it. Make the laughs count in the time you do have, and try not to focus on the negative. Try to make everlasting and uplifting memories, and don’t spoil the moment with useless arguments. Use the rule of five: if it isn’t going to matter in five years, don’t spend more than five minutes worrying about it.

Being in love is hard work, because love isn’t just a feeling. It is a conscious decision you make every day. Life will get a little busy, things may become a little tougher, and arguments could arise, but the method to overcome this battle is communication. Communication is key.

If you had a hectic, stressful day and just want some time to yourself, communicate to your partner that you do miss him/her and wish you could talk the way you always do, but you are just having a day and need time to collect your thoughts.

Enjoy this time for yourself, for being in a relationship should not feel like a prison sentence. You should feel free to be yourself as long as it respects the loyalty in the bond of the relationship.

During this period of being apart, use it to your advantage. Do not look at it as a negative thing, but as a way to grow and strengthen the communication and bond between you and your partner.

Long-distance is hard, but if this person is someone that truly and genuinely loves you, and vise versa, then try to make it work. If you are the only one trying and you find yourself being left to figure out the other person’s feelings for you, then that too is a message; you are just too afraid to open it. Relationships and communication go both ways, and if it is only one-sided, then it is not a relationship and there is no communication.

And just because it does not work now, does not mean it never will. Let it go; it might be hard, but dive into something you would never think to try and find something you love. Write, adventure, join a club, get involved, start a business, drive to the local Wendy’s at one in the morning. You can do anything you set your mind to and the rest will fall into place.

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Destiny Peetoom

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